Enjoying the Process

As some of you may have learned by now, my husband and I are expecting our second child in late July/early August of this year. This pregnancy really took my by surprise which is odd because we were not using birth control so technically "were trying." I went through one full cycle after getting of the pill and the next month, boom pregnant! I am certainly not complaining because I fully recognize that it makes many people a long time and lots of effort to get pregnant. However, it really took me back. It is one thing to dream of the days of pregnancy and newborn with fondness however it is quite another to accept the reality that all of this needs to be incorporated into your already busy life. I had told myself that with my second pregnancy (especially since we plan for it to be the last) I would enjoy it more and stress less. There is so much more settled in our lives than with the early stages of my pregnancy with E.

However, once that pee stick showed a double line the old ways kicked right in. I started stressing about the impact to our family and could be handle it. What if it was girl and I had to buy all new clothes? Should I change the nursery? What kind of bedding would E have? Would I use cloth from day one or disposables? What is I miscarried? What is this baby wasn't healthy? What if I drank too much coffee? How much weight was I going to gain? How was I going to start exercising again? Was I going for a VBAC or a planned s c section? And on and on and on...Then somewhere along the line in the past few weeks, I started to regain control. Most of the stuff on this list is either not important or those things of which I have no control. I do not want to look back and say I stressed the whole time or worse stressed my husband who is normally much more laid back about these things. So I have taken a collective deep breath and allowed time to bring about these answers. So going forward, I am trying to keep my cool and worry less so I can enjoy the process of it all because like most beautiful stages of life....if you blink you will miss it.

TV Monster

We have created a TV monster. As E as gotten older, we have allowed tv programming to enter his life but only under strict guidelines. He is only allowed to view PBS sponsored programming. We normally allow him to watch tv for short periods of time after he wakes up in the morning and after nap. It serves two purposes, 1) it allows him to ease into wakefulness because quite frankly sometimes he is a really crab (like is Daddy) and 2) it gives us snuggle time with our son who is constantly on the go. However, I have noticed it creeping into other times of the day as a source of entertainment so we can take a minute to breath, get something done, etc. I remember who vehemently I disagreed with this method when he was younger (and I didn't know any better). Last week's illness has only heightened this issue. He was so sick that he needed to spend lots of time resting and the our bed and TV provided a comfortable place for him to get this much needed rest. So yes, we have no one else but ourselves to blame! So now we must start the invention process despite the crying fits and loss of self time. It must be done. I certainly will not try to push my husband to follow any strict schedule as he is the stay at home parent but at this point, I think we both see it is an issue. And with baby # 2 coming this summer, we don't want he/she to be exposed to too much TV and have the same benefit as Emory. So I am about to take a deep breath, attempt a distractions, and turn off his show!

Wish me luck!

Be careful what you wish for...

I believe most toddler mamas can relate, especially those who mother boys, when I say sometimes you want them to slow down a little. Just so you can ease into the day or enjoy a leisurely afternoon at home or even have a peaceful evening!

Well, now I am wishing for my normal toddler boy to return. We have been dealing with one heck of a virus since late Thursday. Since then here is what our weekend has looked like:

-Two trips to the Pediatrician
-Chest X rays
-Nebulizer Treatments every 4-6 hours
-Countless doses of Tylenol
-Checking Temperature every few hours
-Cleaning up vomit...two nights in a row
-Laundry, laundry, and more laundry
-Pleading with E to eat and drink
-Waking up throughout the night to adjust blankets and soothe
-Dealing with whining, lots of whining
-Oh and temper tantrums
-Hours of Sprout
-Hylands Chest and Cough Meds
-Wiping running noses (his and mine)
-Disinfecting
-Mama drinking tea, popping Vitamin C, and praying to avoid the same illness

My 4 day weekend has turned into a rotation at the infirmary. So yes please, give me back my busy toddler and soon!

Less...

Do you ever look back at given day, reflect upon you thoughts, words, actions and think man am I really that snarky B*&^% I was impersonating today? I have those days a lot when I let my mouth and my emotions get away from me. It make me sad because I find in the end I have not presented a true picture of who am I or want to be. I might add that I think motherhood adds to this snarki-ness because mamas do so much comparing and have so much guilt! And really what it all comes down to is your insecurities or feelings of inadequacey. I want to be more positive and kind hearted to those around me. So my goal starting today is to be less...

judgemental
insecure
gossipy (yes I know, not really a word)
negative
dismissive
impatient

Real Food

Like most people, the start of the new year bring about resolutions and goals. I don't have a list of new things but will simply try to get back to the normal goals I have for myself and my family. Since the birth of my son and maybe even before I have had a interest in eating more "real food." The definitition of that term means different things to different people but for me it means to eat better quality foods along with more fruits and vegetables while keeping overly processed items to a minimum. Now does that mean I will never eat anything out of a box or a bag or even indulge occasionally in something greasy/unhealthy? Most certainly not but what it does mean is that less of my food choices will be surrounded by those items. In order to do this, I have been trying to plan in advance for meals and snacks. My husband does a lot of our cooking but I try to help out on my work from home days and weekends. So in the spirit of planning ahead here are some of the items on the menu for this week:

Breakfast
-Irish Oatmeal
-Whole Wheat Toast w/ Natural Peanut Butter
-Whole Wheat Banana Pancakes
-Whole Grain Cereal
-Eggs, any style

Lunch
-Egg Salad with Whole Grain Crackers
-Grilled Cheese with Whole Wheat Bread
-PBJ with Whole Wheat Bread

Dinner
-Homemade Chicken Nuggets with Sweet Potatoe Fries
-Slow Cooked Pork Sandwiches
-Chicken Pot Pie
-Homemade Hamburgers

*I am also going to try for 5-7 fruits/ vegetables per diem. I currently have the following fresh produce:
-Navel Oranges
-Clementines
-Bananas
-Strawberries
-Apples
-Green Grapes
-Colored Peppers
-Tomatoes
-Celery
-Romaine Lettuce

Tonight's Dinner:
Caprese Salad
Stuffed Shells with Pomodoro Sauce

My Kitchen Window

For as long as I can remember, I had always hoped that my "forever" home would have a window right above the sink. I thought it would make the chore of washing dishes a little less mundane if I could look out the window and day dream. I got just what I wished for in our house. There is a big window right above my sink and the backdrop is absolutely perfect. While we do live in suburban neighborhood, we are fortunate enough to have nearly two acres of land most of which is in our back yard. Our back yard is full of trees and creek so there is plenty to look at during each season. The unexpected bonus is the swing set right below the window where there are simply three swings. When we first moved in I was about 5 months pregnant and full of whimsical sentimentalism. I would wash dishes in my less then perfect kitchen and dream of the day when my children would be out in the yard playing and swinging. There have been many days where I have seen that day dream come to fruition but none more perfect than yesterday. Yesterday was gorgeous, very warm day here in Virginia. And after Emory's nap, his Daddy took him outside to play and enjoy the weather while mama stayed in to cook dinner. And I was at my sink washing and peeling potatoes I looked out my window and there it was perfection. Emory running down to the swing set to "belly swing" with his Daddy not far behind. He entertained himself with that for a little bit and then his tiny hand grabbed my husband's to walk the "trail" in our backyard. There they were my two boys walking in our woods on a Saturday afternoon, my heart was so full and then I remembered...this was my dream come true. Thank you Lord for granting me this blessing. I will treasure it always.